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Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Monday, April 07, 2008
moving
I am moving to a new site. The blog will have the same name just more wonderful features... for me.
this way...
this way...
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Friday, April 04, 2008
Mad as Hell: The Aftermath
You know this entry is a little late in coming. Actually it is very late in coming. If you recall in my previous entry I talked about Jun sleeping at my place one night. After he arrived and had fallen asleep my parents called me and I without thinking told them that my friend was over and was sleeping in my bed.
I recently came out to my parents and they are not taking it to well. So my parents took me innocently saying that my friend is sleeping in my bed as my FRIEND WHO I AM DATING AND PROBABLY FUCKED BEFORE YOU CALLED is sleeping in my bed. At the time of the call they acted with a great bit of calm. The following Monday I called my mom to just talk a bit. She seemed upset and cold. I assumed that maybe she and my father had had another argument or she was just not having a good day. So that call was very short.
The next day, a Tuesday, my dad called me in the morning and basically asked why I didn't care about the family and he informed me that I had made my mother upset by talking about my "friend." My father and I share similar tempers. If you speak to us suddenly with an accusatory and disrespectful tone we become instantly angry and... "loud." I unlike my father can resist the urge to scream for about 15 seconds. I used those seconds to inform my father that I will call him back and hung up.
I think I took about twenty minutes to eat a sandwich and talk to my guinea pig. Yes, I talk to animals and I like to believe that they don't understand a word I say.
After my twenty minute break I called my father back and we talked. Actually we argued. He accused me of not caring about my family. He expressed his desire to have grandchildren and he told me that being gay was a death sentence. He also implied that I was not a man because I was gay and then my mom came home. She got on the phone and the conversation shifted to religious reason for why being gay is wrong. I was told that being gay was a choice and if I wanted to I could change. They seemed shocked that I was not making an effort to change.
All of those things made me upset, pissed, and wee bit amused. I actually anticipated my parents eventually expressing those types of ideas. So ultimately I wasn't that upset.
I just get really frustrated with religious arguments. The bible which I haven't really studied deeply is, like all books, open to interpretation. I don't know most of those interpretations. My parents have their interpretation memorized and they hold it close to their heart. Anything that I say in opposition to their opinion is met with laughing and shouting.
Today I am reading some comments on homosexuality being caused by genetics and some of the comments are amazing. The arguments for and against homosexuality are very interesting. I have to admit that I am taking notes. I want to be better prepared for the next times my parents and I argue. It is so difficult and I would say unfair to try to argue with two people at one time.
I can tell that my parents still love me and are concerned about me, but right now their way of saying it is lacking in finesse. Normally I call home about 2 or 3 times a month. I am down to 1 maybe 2 now and I really don't have any desire to change that.
I recently came out to my parents and they are not taking it to well. So my parents took me innocently saying that my friend is sleeping in my bed as my FRIEND WHO I AM DATING AND PROBABLY FUCKED BEFORE YOU CALLED is sleeping in my bed. At the time of the call they acted with a great bit of calm. The following Monday I called my mom to just talk a bit. She seemed upset and cold. I assumed that maybe she and my father had had another argument or she was just not having a good day. So that call was very short.
The next day, a Tuesday, my dad called me in the morning and basically asked why I didn't care about the family and he informed me that I had made my mother upset by talking about my "friend." My father and I share similar tempers. If you speak to us suddenly with an accusatory and disrespectful tone we become instantly angry and... "loud." I unlike my father can resist the urge to scream for about 15 seconds. I used those seconds to inform my father that I will call him back and hung up.
I think I took about twenty minutes to eat a sandwich and talk to my guinea pig. Yes, I talk to animals and I like to believe that they don't understand a word I say.
After my twenty minute break I called my father back and we talked. Actually we argued. He accused me of not caring about my family. He expressed his desire to have grandchildren and he told me that being gay was a death sentence. He also implied that I was not a man because I was gay and then my mom came home. She got on the phone and the conversation shifted to religious reason for why being gay is wrong. I was told that being gay was a choice and if I wanted to I could change. They seemed shocked that I was not making an effort to change.
All of those things made me upset, pissed, and wee bit amused. I actually anticipated my parents eventually expressing those types of ideas. So ultimately I wasn't that upset.
I just get really frustrated with religious arguments. The bible which I haven't really studied deeply is, like all books, open to interpretation. I don't know most of those interpretations. My parents have their interpretation memorized and they hold it close to their heart. Anything that I say in opposition to their opinion is met with laughing and shouting.
Today I am reading some comments on homosexuality being caused by genetics and some of the comments are amazing. The arguments for and against homosexuality are very interesting. I have to admit that I am taking notes. I want to be better prepared for the next times my parents and I argue. It is so difficult and I would say unfair to try to argue with two people at one time.
I can tell that my parents still love me and are concerned about me, but right now their way of saying it is lacking in finesse. Normally I call home about 2 or 3 times a month. I am down to 1 maybe 2 now and I really don't have any desire to change that.
Dating
What is the point? Really. What is the point... the purpose of dating?
When I was younger I had very few opinions on the subject. It was another word for courting and therefore open to the scrutiny and teasing of parents and relatives. I have memories of my aunts pointing and cooing in that annoyingly condescending voice that adults use to tease children, "Oh look! They're courting." I don't think I know of any person who ever found that type of talk pleasurable.
Anyway, dating when I was younger was something to be avoided. As I grew older and realized that my penis did more than piss my opinion of dating changed. Dating became an unavoidable step to dependable booty. In some ways I still hold that opinion but now it is starting to change. Booty is important but I want more.
How much more?
I am not sure about that. A life commitment seems a bit big, but I think I just need to know that I am important to someone.
You know? How do you even asks someone about how important you are to them?
That type of question seems like a conversation killer. Like "POW," and the conversation is dead.
If a person succeeds in deciding how much more they want from dating then what?
Should they start dating people as if they were holding auditions? Is that what dating is for? To audition people? To see if they have that thing you want?
When I was younger I had very few opinions on the subject. It was another word for courting and therefore open to the scrutiny and teasing of parents and relatives. I have memories of my aunts pointing and cooing in that annoyingly condescending voice that adults use to tease children, "Oh look! They're courting." I don't think I know of any person who ever found that type of talk pleasurable.
Anyway, dating when I was younger was something to be avoided. As I grew older and realized that my penis did more than piss my opinion of dating changed. Dating became an unavoidable step to dependable booty. In some ways I still hold that opinion but now it is starting to change. Booty is important but I want more.
How much more?
I am not sure about that. A life commitment seems a bit big, but I think I just need to know that I am important to someone.
You know? How do you even asks someone about how important you are to them?
That type of question seems like a conversation killer. Like "POW," and the conversation is dead.
If a person succeeds in deciding how much more they want from dating then what?
Should they start dating people as if they were holding auditions? Is that what dating is for? To audition people? To see if they have that thing you want?
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Yes, My Lord
Most of my friends know that I like anime. A lot. Some, a select few who are actually living on borrowed time, would call it an obsession. They are crazy and maintaining that theory is only a sign of their insanity.
My friend Dodzi has requested that I watch a new anime, Code: Geass. The spelling of the name is actually up for debate. I have seen it on the manga cover spelled as "Giess" but in the anime translation they spell it as "Geass". The spelling actually isn't important. Dodzi and I share similar taste in anime: violence, destruction, and great big fireballs. Dodzi likes a few of the cuter things too, but I don't hold it against him. Perfection just isn't right for every one.
Anyway Code: Geass is interesting. It has many good and bad points. Yes, I am going to count them off one by one.
Good:
1. The vast majority of the female characters in the show kick ass without being clad in only a few well placed shoe strings. There are a few exceptions, but they die or go crazy so it is OK. For an anime to not make the female characters wear next to nothing and kick ass is very strange, but this show does it well. It might be because the manga and anime were created by an all female group of artist called Clamp.
2. There are a pretty good amount of twists and turns in the story.
Example: An innocent and totally likable, lame female character who would normally never be able to kick a puppy suddenly goes "crazy" and orders the death of about 20,000 Japanese people.
3. The main character isn't perfect. He lacks fighting skills and his decisions are extremely questionable.
Example: He makes the aforementioned innocent character go crazy.
Bad:
1. 60% percent of the women are lesbians or totally sexless.
2. The soldiers are all tools. When the innocent character went visibly crazy they continued to follow her commands.
3. The main characters are stupid. Like really stupid.
4. The show is in Japanese but for some reason it suddenly slips into really awkward English. They say things like, "blah, blah, blah! Yes, my lord!" There is a whole list of English phrases that they say like that. It all sounds crazy.
I give Code: Geass a 3 out of 5. I believe Dodzi will argue with me about that, but as I have been told by some of my more understanding friends, the things that I say feel final. It is actually more than a feeling. It is a fact and one of these days Dodzi will understand that.
My friend Dodzi has requested that I watch a new anime, Code: Geass. The spelling of the name is actually up for debate. I have seen it on the manga cover spelled as "Giess" but in the anime translation they spell it as "Geass". The spelling actually isn't important. Dodzi and I share similar taste in anime: violence, destruction, and great big fireballs. Dodzi likes a few of the cuter things too, but I don't hold it against him. Perfection just isn't right for every one.
Anyway Code: Geass is interesting. It has many good and bad points. Yes, I am going to count them off one by one.
Good:
1. The vast majority of the female characters in the show kick ass without being clad in only a few well placed shoe strings. There are a few exceptions, but they die or go crazy so it is OK. For an anime to not make the female characters wear next to nothing and kick ass is very strange, but this show does it well. It might be because the manga and anime were created by an all female group of artist called Clamp.
2. There are a pretty good amount of twists and turns in the story.
Example: An innocent and totally likable, lame female character who would normally never be able to kick a puppy suddenly goes "crazy" and orders the death of about 20,000 Japanese people.
3. The main character isn't perfect. He lacks fighting skills and his decisions are extremely questionable.
Example: He makes the aforementioned innocent character go crazy.
Bad:
1. 60% percent of the women are lesbians or totally sexless.
2. The soldiers are all tools. When the innocent character went visibly crazy they continued to follow her commands.
3. The main characters are stupid. Like really stupid.
4. The show is in Japanese but for some reason it suddenly slips into really awkward English. They say things like, "blah, blah, blah! Yes, my lord!" There is a whole list of English phrases that they say like that. It all sounds crazy.
I give Code: Geass a 3 out of 5. I believe Dodzi will argue with me about that, but as I have been told by some of my more understanding friends, the things that I say feel final. It is actually more than a feeling. It is a fact and one of these days Dodzi will understand that.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Have you ever thought something extremely pricky and wanted to call someone up to tell it to them. That is the way I feel right now. My roommate is cooking french toast and I don`t think I like her jeans. I want to say something about it but i think that would be a little less than nice on my part.
I am feeling a bit tired right now and the filter between the evil portions of my brain and my mouth is being serviced right now.
Damn her ass looks big in those jeans.
I am feeling a bit tired right now and the filter between the evil portions of my brain and my mouth is being serviced right now.
Damn her ass looks big in those jeans.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
More Pictures and Words
I hurt. Not all over. Just my legs. Actually everything from my ankles to where my butt joins my back and a little further hurts. Right now the pain isn't so bad, but I'm pretty certain that in the morning I will be in more than my pain will be a little more acute.
This morning Tomo sent me an e-mail about going hiking in a nearby mountain. I've never been hiking in a mountain so I said yes. I am really glad I did. I had a great time with him on Jokoji Mountain.
We hiked for about three hours and saw nature. Writing that I've seen Nature today feels a bit weird, but I live in a city. A big city. I have gone months without actually seeing a real tree (a real tree is any tree that hasn't been continuously manicured into a street accessory) or a real patch of grass.
I communed with NATURE today and it scared me a few times. I am deathly afraid of snakes and for some reason Ma Nature so fit to put no less than 500 little brown lizards on or near the path we were walking on and at one point she placed a small bird on the path right in front of me. I damn near stepped on it. It suddenly started screaming at my feet and running off. Of course I screamed, Tomo would call it a shriek... a girly shriek, but I am going to stick with scream.
At any rate Mother Nature had it in for me today. Here are some pics from the hike.
This morning Tomo sent me an e-mail about going hiking in a nearby mountain. I've never been hiking in a mountain so I said yes. I am really glad I did. I had a great time with him on Jokoji Mountain.
We hiked for about three hours and saw nature. Writing that I've seen Nature today feels a bit weird, but I live in a city. A big city. I have gone months without actually seeing a real tree (a real tree is any tree that hasn't been continuously manicured into a street accessory) or a real patch of grass.
I communed with NATURE today and it scared me a few times. I am deathly afraid of snakes and for some reason Ma Nature so fit to put no less than 500 little brown lizards on or near the path we were walking on and at one point she placed a small bird on the path right in front of me. I damn near stepped on it. It suddenly started screaming at my feet and running off. Of course I screamed, Tomo would call it a shriek... a girly shriek, but I am going to stick with scream.
At any rate Mother Nature had it in for me today. Here are some pics from the hike.
Friday, March 28, 2008
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Mad As Hell
Recently I went on a bit of a rant about how I was going to release Jun back into the wild. Well I haven't. He came over last Monday, delivered my money AND dinner. You can't hand a guy who actually cooked you dinner his walking papers. At least not right away. So for now he is still in holding on death row.
Last night he stole my sleep. Yes, stole. He called my phone at like 3:30 in the motherfucking morning talking about coming over cause he was drunk and couldn't drive to his house and because I'm a bleeding heart I let his bitch ass come over and now I've been sitting on my couch since 4:15 because it is virtually impossible to sleep in the same bed as him. He is one of those people that parks themselves squarely in the center of the bed while wrapping themselves in the blanket.
Yes, you could say rude. Inconsiderate. ASSHOLE!!!
I am so freaking sleepy now, but I got stuff to do today which is why I will be tossing him out into the street in about one hour.
Last night he stole my sleep. Yes, stole. He called my phone at like 3:30 in the motherfucking morning talking about coming over cause he was drunk and couldn't drive to his house and because I'm a bleeding heart I let his bitch ass come over and now I've been sitting on my couch since 4:15 because it is virtually impossible to sleep in the same bed as him. He is one of those people that parks themselves squarely in the center of the bed while wrapping themselves in the blanket.
Yes, you could say rude. Inconsiderate. ASSHOLE!!!
I am so freaking sleepy now, but I got stuff to do today which is why I will be tossing him out into the street in about one hour.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Where the hell is Whitney?
I haven't breathed in about two weeks. I received some bad news from a friend of mine and felt like I should take an HIV test. So I did. I searched the Internet for links to an English speaking doctor that does HIV tests. I found one but he 10,000 yen. (basically 100 dollars.) In my opinion peace of mind has no price, so I was preparing to rip open my wallet and pay the money, but then this soft, sultry, sexy, sublime, wonderfully kind nurse said, "wait." She looked around and found a city health office that does HIV tests for free. I said thank you and went off in search of the office. I found the office last Monday and now I have my results.
This is where Ms. Whitney Houston would come in nicely. I need her to come out and sing that class jam from the movie Waiting to Exhale. I have been waiting for seven days for a little Japanese woman in a lab coat and red class to give me two thumbs up and a smile.
I love that woman and I love Whitney. I was so happy that I didn't even take the train back home. I walked and sang Shoop the entire way.
I am so happy, but at the same time I feel a little sad. I got good news today, but somewhere someone didn't get such good news. There was a man waiting to see the doctor too. He was actually before me and he looked so nervous. I sat beside him and I could hear his shallow nervous breathing. I didn't talk to him, but I do hope that his news was as good as mine. No one should have to wait in that condition, but then again every one should take steps to ensure that they don't find themselves in that situation.
He left quickly after leaving the doctors office. I hope he is well.
Perhaps Whitney should get tested too.
This is where Ms. Whitney Houston would come in nicely. I need her to come out and sing that class jam from the movie Waiting to Exhale. I have been waiting for seven days for a little Japanese woman in a lab coat and red class to give me two thumbs up and a smile.
I love that woman and I love Whitney. I was so happy that I didn't even take the train back home. I walked and sang Shoop the entire way.
I am so happy, but at the same time I feel a little sad. I got good news today, but somewhere someone didn't get such good news. There was a man waiting to see the doctor too. He was actually before me and he looked so nervous. I sat beside him and I could hear his shallow nervous breathing. I didn't talk to him, but I do hope that his news was as good as mine. No one should have to wait in that condition, but then again every one should take steps to ensure that they don't find themselves in that situation.
He left quickly after leaving the doctors office. I hope he is well.
Perhaps Whitney should get tested too.
10000 BC
You have got to be shitting me. What the fuck is up with the beautiful blue eyed, perfectly made up useless white bitch running around this movie? Why the white people look so clean?
Why?
Who is trimming his beard? Who? Tell me. Please. Why does he have so many muscles? Isn't this supposed to be 10,000 B.C. Shouldn't he look a little hungrier. Dirtier. More ignorant?
I don't think that I, in good conscience, could watch this movie. I would make jokes the entire time. This movie just had the whole white Jesus feel going for it. You know like in those old religious movie that every one's mom, grandmother, or aunt has on a VHS cassette somewhere in their house. The one's with Charlton Heston. That might be Spartacus, but you get the idea.
This movie is going to suck.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Friday, March 07, 2008
I recently got a very nice email from Peanut. It made me smile and jump around a little bit. Unfortunately I haven't replied to the mail yet, but I probably will after I finish this entry. He has received a fellowship or grant or just something incredible from a university in Florida and he has gotten married. I am amazingly happy for him, but also amazingly jealous. He's probably going to read this and call me a bitch or something. I don't care. I'll be jealous.
Anyway, I think I'm going to be bringing one of my more tumultuous friendships to an end very soon. I've been trying for quite sometime to break myself free of Jun, but it has been more than a little hard. I hate to see anything end. It is so bad at times that I will put off finishing a book for days... weeks even. I have been doing that with Jun, but now the Jun saga has taken a very interesting turn.
His ex-boyfriend has appeared and has brought with him some of the juiciest gossip I have ever heard. Apparently Jun has:
been arrested
been to jail
been involved with illegal gambling
reneged on about 80,000 yen of rent
punched a hole into some one's wall
lobbed dishes at the same some one's head
had sexual relations with a twelve year old boy while in Germany
and many more things that just boggle the mind
At first I didn't want to believe the ex-boyfriend but the more I thought about it the more it all started to seem true. It makes perfect sense. All of these allegations add up to an individual that I really don't think I should be associating with especially while in a foreign country. So it is with a heavy heart that I have decided to officially release him back into the wild AFTER he gives me back my 10,000 yen.
Anyway, I think I'm going to be bringing one of my more tumultuous friendships to an end very soon. I've been trying for quite sometime to break myself free of Jun, but it has been more than a little hard. I hate to see anything end. It is so bad at times that I will put off finishing a book for days... weeks even. I have been doing that with Jun, but now the Jun saga has taken a very interesting turn.
His ex-boyfriend has appeared and has brought with him some of the juiciest gossip I have ever heard. Apparently Jun has:
been arrested
been to jail
been involved with illegal gambling
reneged on about 80,000 yen of rent
punched a hole into some one's wall
lobbed dishes at the same some one's head
had sexual relations with a twelve year old boy while in Germany
and many more things that just boggle the mind
At first I didn't want to believe the ex-boyfriend but the more I thought about it the more it all started to seem true. It makes perfect sense. All of these allegations add up to an individual that I really don't think I should be associating with especially while in a foreign country. So it is with a heavy heart that I have decided to officially release him back into the wild AFTER he gives me back my 10,000 yen.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
no title today
I really don't have much of anything to say right now. I received an email from one of my friends earlier today and it has filled my mind damn near to bursting. So I have nothing that I can report about right now.
I have to see a few things through quickly before I can pick up being... boring and opinionated.
I have to see a few things through quickly before I can pick up being... boring and opinionated.
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